Overheard.

Dad: You're doing it wrong!
Mom: You are NOT foreman of this house, sir!
Dad:...you're still doing it wrong.

Mother Lover

Have you ever met my Mom?
Allow me to introduce her.
She:
Loves reality television.
Went to college on a softball scholarship.
Gave birth to her third child at home.
Doesn't wear make-up because she doesn't need to.
Thinks The Lonely Island are a riot and (not so) secretly wants me to marry Andy Samberg so she will have talented and hilarious grandchildren.
Admits that Napoleon Dynamite is her favorite movie (a close second? Forgetting Sarah Marshall).
Still loves me no matter how much I've charged to her credit card during past shopping endeavors.
Makes spaghetti sauce better than anyone you know.
Always tells the truth.
Has been married to the same man for 32 years.
Loves her children more than she loves herself.

In other words? She is awesome.

I'm pretty lucky to have such a cool Mother, no?

In honor of all you mothers and mother lovers out there, I give you....my mom's fave video.

Mom's Are The Bestest

Aren't they?
My awesome mom sent this to me the other day.
I happened to be at work, and my e-mail happens to go to my Blackberry, and I just happened to check it while I had some downtime (certainly NOT while I wasn't supposed to be looking at my phone).
It was the best possible relief I could have asked for at that particular point in time. I've been really consumed with my job lately, which has taken a major toll on my emotions.

I wish I knew where it came from so I would be able to give credit where credit is due.
If anyone does, let me know and I'll gladly link it.

In the mean time, please enjoy.
And don't forget to stop and smell the roses.
Or something like that.

SLOW DANCE

Have you ever

watched

kids

On a merry-go-round?

Or listened to

the rain
Slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a

butterfly's erratic flight?

Or gazed at the sun into the

fading

night?

You better slow down.

Don't

dance so

fast.

Time is short.

The music

won't last.

Do you run through each day

On the fly?

When you ask "How are you?"

Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done

Do you lie in your bed

With the next hundred chores

Running through your head?

You'd better slow down

Don't dance so

fast.

Time is

short.

The music won't last.

Ever told your

child,

"We'll do it tomorrow?"

And in your haste,

Not see his

sorrow?

Ever lost touch,

Let a good

friendship die

Cause you

never had time

To call and say,'Hi'

You'd better slow down.

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last..

When you run

so fast to get somewhere

You miss half the fun of getting

there.

When you worry and hurry

through your day,

It is like an unopened gift....

Thrown away.

Life is not a race.

Do take it slower

Hear the music

Before the song is over.

Ruth and Ray have a conversation

Making pancakes...

Dad: How much batter should I make?
Mom: Well, look at the recipe. How many does it yield?
Dad: Yield? What is this yield business?
Mom: It's a cooking term.
Dad: Yeah, but it's the kind of thing that gets written at the end of a recipe. No one actually uses it in real life.


Discussing their new fireplace, a little while later....

Mom: So, have you talked to anyone about how to do the gas fittings?
Dad: Nope. I'm just gonna wing-it.
Mom: What happens if you blow yourself up? More importantly, what if you blow us both up?
Dad:Well, if that happens....then we've yielded three beautiful children. They can collect on the life insurance.
Mom:...
Dad: You don't trust me, do you?
Mom: After 30 years, I've learned to trust you. But when you say things like that, you don't always convince me.


I run to the computer, and furiously start typing their conversation, because I'm convinced that Molly and Marie will think it's hilarious...

Dad: What are you doing?
Me:...definitely not typing a transcript of the conversation you just had...
Dad: Jeez! Is anything in this family private anymore?!

Apparently not.

The Verdict

Re: Quantum of Solace

Ummm...I was bored.
Like, for real.
I think we all expected better, especially from "the best Bond movie ever."
No seriously.

One of the more redeeming elements?

Please observe the display at the right -------->
Yeah.
And he wore some really awesome Valentino suits.
And a tux.
A TUX.
I think we all know how I feel about men in tuxes.

Yes.


On a more productive note... the tire is fixed! Freaking finally.
Three cheers for AAA, who arrived in under ten minutes, not to mention the fact that they got down on the dirty, nasty, wet ground. While I watched.
I salute you, AAA!


We watched this movie tonight before I had to go to work about vampires in Sweden and bullies and bad haircuts (I only included that because there are a LOT of bad haircuts in this movie-- more on that later). It was, to say the least, enjoyable. Scratch that. Very enjoyable. It was poignant and profound and not at all scary like other Vampire-oriented flicks. I'm not even kidding. It in no way made me think that I would wake up in the middle of the night and look out the window and endure a paralyzing wave of terror coupled with visions of vampires leaping across the roofs of snow-covered buildings in the moonlight.
Not that such a thing has ever happened.
Especially not after watching 40 Days of Night.

Anyway, the best part of the movie was not, as you might imagine, the artistic styling or progressive character development. I think the award for most entertaining movie element goes to the colorful commentary that comes along with watching ANY movie with me.
Not because I'm witty.
Mostly because I don't always think before I say things.

For example, I decided to let everyone know that I had been to Sweden (where the movie was set, in case you missed that part). I happen to do that every time I'm watching a TV show of movie that involves someplace I've been.
Why do I do such a thing?
Because I am awesome.

So I announced that I was familiar with the Swedes. Like the bad-ass that I am.
And, as a result, I endured some following questions all throughout our movie-going experience:
"Hey Molly, are all haircuts in Sweden that crappy?"
"Do all Swedes walk around in their underwear constantly?"
"Apparently, Swedish forensic science is not as advanced as their furniture-making abilities."

Okay, so maybe that last one was me.

Either way, I should probably stop painting myself as some kind of expert on foreign culture. Particularly since I'm not.

Oh, and a quick note to my Mom:
I hereby solemnly swear to never EVER put you in a nursing home.
Explanation to follow sometime in the near future.

I'm going to go eat some more jalapeno pretzels now.